The Smothered topic comes up a lot, and needs to be brought to our attention WITHOUT us getting our feelings hurt. So before you read this say to yourself, my feelings are NOT hurt.
Some thoughts from guys:
"Don't puppy dog me to stay over till all hours of the night unless I want to."
"The thing I hate is when the girl just always expects that you will hang out every night, and of course you want to because you like her, but you also like time to do your own thing. Even if it's just watching TV or reading."
"I just want time to process things and think on my own, even to get things done." "Once you get serious you start seeing each other more and more, because if you are going to marry them you want to know if you could see them everyday. It can be a test of 'make it, or break it' when you hang out a lot. Don't break it before the relationship even gets serious."
In a Gender Differences class I learned something that helps me understand this better. *Guys are task oriented. They are not driven by relationships like girls are, but by subconscious or conscious check lists. Translation: They hang out with us because they know they need to in order to keep the relationship afloat and to show love (like). You have to remember we think and show love differently!!! It's not that they don't like you... they just like some time to themselves, that's why I suggest letting them initiate a little more of the contact.
A couple things to keep in mind:
1. Do NOT withdraw from your boy just because of this information... that was NOT the point. You can still open up, while backing off.
2. If your guy wants to spend less and less and less and less time with you... read the signs and ask him what's up. But if he just wants a couple days to himself a week, no freaking out until further notice.
So... instead of having your feelings hurt from this post, give the guy some space because you UNDERSTAND that he's trying his best too.
*Source: Looking Out Looking In