Friday, January 9, 2009

Just Wanna Be Friends

Dear Rules Girl,

I’ve been asked out again by someone I thought I had given a signal to that I wasn't interested (by not being available, and only doing group things) but I guess he didn't get it. He's fine to hang out with but I'm not really interested in dating him - think I need to just spell it out to him? I know I could just say I have other plans again, just not sure what's best (and nicest to him). . .


Just Wanna be Friends

Dear Just Wanna be Friends,

A rules girl never leads a guy on (the nicest thing is to let them move on) so making the clean cut back to friends is the best thing I can suggest. It’s all about the open, but not-too-much communication. You could write a simple e-mail thanking him for the offer, and then say something along these lines:

“I just want to make sure that I haven’t given you the wrong impression of our friendship and if I have, I’m sorry. I would love to be friends with you, but I’m not interested in pursuing anything more than that. If I’ve misinterpreted your invite, please let me know. You’re a good friend, and I would like to continue the friendship as it is.”

It’s a hard place to be… in-between “friends and friendlier”, but you can make it what you want.

Good luck!


Rules Girl

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